Driving Test Results

WHY ?????????????
WHY??????????????????????????
WHY?????????????????????????????????????

God, why didn't I pass such a simple part of the test ? Going uphill is supposedly THE EASIEST.
And I, Stephanie Lee Su-Ling, the so-called brainy one, FAILED it..when every other complete idiot passed.

My only consolation is that I passed the road driving test with 19/20.

But this is just plain embarassing.

And I'm exhibiting my humiliation for everyone else to hear.
As a lesson for myself.

Always pray before attempting to manover the wheel. And going up the hill. And getting into a car for that matter.

This is not an attempt to blame God for not letting me pass the stupid driving test. This is merely a ranting and grouse of all sorts..

But God does do the Yin-Yang thing. He always gives you something good to balance out your bad day. Suffice to say, today wasn't completely wasted.

AND BLAR YOU DRIVING OFFICERS aka COMPLETE IDIOTS FOR WASTING MY TIME WHEN I COULD HAVE PASSED THAT TEST EASY PEASY, I'm still gonna drive anyway,

CHOI !!! BAD LUCK SHOO SHOO !!!
TOUCH WOOD !!! This is so not gonna happen to me, I will not fail a 2nd time. No siree.

Details of Kay Elle that I ABSOLUTELY MUST REMEMBER

I should be in bed right now, I just said g'night to my mom, but somehow I can't sleep. Too many things running on my mind and I need to get her/them/It to shut up.

Procrastinate my sleepiness for a little while longer..

1) Summary of my day

6 am - Woke up at this ungodly hour to go to the GYM
Practised Ballet Adv, mainly because Celeste's gonna teach ballet next Mon
( PANICKING,,, )-

Ballet feels so good...my fondu's actually felt like fondue ! The melting quality was probably enabled after working on my abductors for 60 mins on the machines..Did

plies, tendus, glise, fondu, rond de jambe en lair - I got the 'kick' and extention, YAY ME !, rond de jambe jete - I totally dissected this now ! it's a swish to a small,low attitude,then throw towards the ear/side, then ROUND & extend, then point on the floor in perfect turn out. YES !!!, and petit battement with pirrouttes and balances

Must remember to engage the back muscles by pressing lightly on my shoulders and pulling the two lines down to connect with my hips too.

[ bear with me, darlings who don't take ballet, and take courage ( love this phrase ), will be moving on soon ]

Then I did pointe work. And people started to staring already. Okay, bad enough there's a girl wacking her legs all around and turning on one tippy toe toe, now she's putting on pre-arched torture foot binders made out of satin ( by the world's best pointe shoe maker, Gaynor Minden ! The best pointe shoes I've ever worn, all thanks to Lexa and the PDC girls ! )

Plus my pirrouttes on pointe are not that great, I was falling all over. WHY ? Because I wasn't holding my core properly and couldn't balance. I was scared and I lost concentration when all those people started staring at me. A BAD MALAYSIAN HABIT =(

NEED TO PRAC MORE TOMORROW ! I don't care, I'm just gonna turn and turn and turn and get my DOUBLE PIRR on POINTE !!!

Steph Lee : DO NOT BE AFRAID ! Remember Li Cun Xin - his book's fab btw. The exact position of the nose, arms, back, hips, thighs, knees, toes !!!

11.15am - Went for G's pilates class before work. She's awesome. Her voice is stil echoing in my mind I swear, " slide the ribcage down to the hips, fold the ribs, hug muscles to spine, keep the tail bone on the same line as the hip/pelvis, don't TILT it down, use your abs, we're focusing on the abs, feel the ribs, hips, zip up the pelvic floor to come up, etc "

I'm really lucky to have found such a good Pilates teacher. All dancers should do some sort of body conditioning in my opinion. Can't wait to go Boulder and check out the Pilates centres there - they have one of the BIGGEST PILATES CENTRES in US there ! Awesome...

oh gosh, my uni application's gonna be reviewed any minute now, it's there !!! keep your fingers, toes, and everything else crossed for me please

As usual, work is ...boring. I want to get a colummist job and get paid to write - that's the course I'm taking anyway - or work in Tower Records, all that music ! Can I intern with some company for 6 months before I leave ??? Please ??? Some one teach me how to...

Then I went for my driving lesson. Drove on the highway from 1U to Amcorp Mall and nearly died in the process. I need to practise - all that clutch, gear, brake, oil,... - Me cannot feel me feet no more...that caramel hazelnut latte from Coffee Bean did not help, I'm STICKING TO STARBUCKS FROM NOW ON !!!!!!!!!!

Got back home in my MOM"S CAR ( HOW ON EARTH CAN SHE DRIVE LIKE THAT EVERY DAY ?? )

gave the ticket - thank God I got rid of it,the more I see it, the more tempted I'd be to rip it apart, I listened to Linkin Park's What I've Done and I really feel like hitting myself, WHAT ON EARTH HAVE I DONE !!??? But at the same time, I feel this tremendous satisfaction and peace of mind. I know I did the right thing, giving up my Switchfoot tickets for you two is the best decision I've made this week and I know you'll enjoy it to the max, compared to this noob about Switchfoot girl -.

wrote emails and emails and emails, me and my EMAILS...and read this hilarious article in Cleo that I absolutely agree with


and now..I've forgotten what I wanted to post about...
Ah...my uni applications...

" It's too late to apologize " - Apologize, Timberland
" Love me, Choose Me,..." - Meredith Grey, from Grey's Anatomy

The Thoughtless Things I Do Sometimes

Today I saw this really really old lady - all stooped over, with a horrible hunchback, and she was carrying a huge plastic bag and climbing up the stairs to the LRT at Taman Jaya, PJ. For those who've been there, those stairs are pretty steep. And she must have been ancient. I mean..gosh, even I get breathless sometimes climbing that tower of torture, the authorities really really should install a lift / elevator for us poor unfit mortals.

She was going up, albeit slowly but surely, one stone step at a time,wobbly and all huffy.

And you know what I did ?

Stephanie Lee just climbed down the stairs, without even giving her a second glance.

It wasn't until she paused at the staircase for a moment to wipe salty sweat off her face, only did I notice her.

And I didn't help. I just stood there and ..gawked ? I didn't go up and offer to carry her bag to wherever she was going, or smiled, or said ' auntie ' and give polite sympathy ( which is what someone said I should have done, instead of just staring at her like us Malaysians are so apt at doing )

I'm such a thoughtless and selfish bitch.

And today, for the first time, I noticed all the litter along the road which I walk on to and fro everyday. How come I've never bothered to pick them up ?

I've also sent a very curt message to a friend, when all he did was ask me how was my day. And it turns out he had a terrible day at work. AND YET, he knew I was having my driving lesson today and was considerate enough to remember my struggles with the wheel.

( We used to be tuition mates in Form 3,a really short spell because I can't take the pressure of mass tuition classes. He'd give me yellow post-it notes with smiley faces whenever I got screamed at by the teacher, and once, he left a choc bar for me when I told him I had a dance exam and couldn't attend class.)

And sorry, WM, for being a bit rude when you asked me about my dinner plans tomorrow.

DAMN ME.
You know what, I actually have a bit more sympathy for our health minister now, Dr Chua...I know what he did was just plain wrong from every possible angle and as a politician,leader,and government servant, he has to maintain higher moral standards.

But he made a bad decision to do what he did, he lost control of his moral judgement - perhaps for the first time? we don't know - . I think it was a thoughtless, maybe impulsive act of lust and loneliness. I personally cannot comprehend how his wife can stand by him and forgive him for that, but I know someone who has forgiven her husband many many times for his affairs with other women.

And I know a person whose capability to forgive is simply, unbelievably, astounding; My Saviour, the Prince of Peace [ ' Forever and ever ', that song from the CIF musical is STILL stuck in my head...geezers... ]

Father in Heaven, hallowed be thy name...Forgive our sins,and help us forgive those who sin against us, lead us not to temptation and protect us from evil. AMEN